


The Time Jehan Marveled in Eternities Lasting Only Twenty Four Hours.

by Magnus_Babe



Series: The Three Times Jehan Prouvaire Was Fucked by Love and the One Time Things Worked Out. [1]
Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: BPD, Crying, Genderfluid Character, Hurt/Comfort, Jehans pronouns are gonna change every lil fic thing and u can't stop me, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mental Illness, Multi, They're just really close friends tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-27
Updated: 2017-01-27
Packaged: 2018-09-20 05:09:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9477029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magnus_Babe/pseuds/Magnus_Babe
Summary: Jehan is upset and won't come out from the cold, R eventually settles on sitting outside with him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> !!! My first Les Mis fic in a series of four about Jehan !!!
> 
> There's not enough love for my small genderfluid child. 
> 
> Scream at me on tumblr!: pastel-prouvaire.tumblr.com
> 
> roleplay w/ me on tumblr ;): timid-in-repose.tumblr.com

If there was an award for fucking up, Jehan supposed at this point it would be going to himself. And maybe that’s how he wound up on the back step of the home he shared with Grantaire; a blanket around his shoulders as he stared blankly out into the snow that was coating the ground in a cold and heavy embrace. 

 

It was times like these when no one knew particularly what to do with the young poet. If anything, it was wise to stay to close. Grantaire had found that out when they had first moved in together. The first time something like this had happened, it had been the same story but a different verse and in the rain. Jehan had an affinity for letting himself go to the elements when anything happened to him. It could have been something poetic, had it not caused so much sickness and just worsened the mood of the frail writer. 

 

Jehan was never surprised to feel Grantaire’s warm hands on his freezing shoulders after a long bout of sitting outside. He was never sure how much time had passed but he was always aware that Grantaire’s entrance usually meant he had anywhere from ten to thirty minutes left before he was forced into a hot bath. 

 

“Do you want to talk about it?” said a pleasant voice after seconds had passed. He hadn’t paid enough attention to realize that R was next to him. 

 

“Today’s just been long.” Jehan murmured, his reply encouraging Grantaire, as he was normally met with silence. 

 

“How long?”

 

“An eternity or three, I would assume.” 

 

“That’s a long time for anyone to deal with being alone, Jehan.”

 

“It came to my attention that it wasn’t the way I wanted to spend all my lifetimes. Even if each one only lasts an hour.” there was a moment's hesitation that followed his words as Jehan let Grantaire attempt to rub some of the warmth back into his shivering form. 

 

“Would you consider coming back inside if I promised to spend the rest of this eternity with you?” R asked quietly, starting to feel the chill from the snow himself. 

 

“There’s only twenty more hours left in it,” he replied softly. 

 

Had it not been for the strawberry blonde locks covering his view, Grantaire might have seen the the mascara stained tears rolling down his cheeks as Jehan sniffled and wiped at his cheeks with the blanket.

 

“So, you  _ are _ aware of what time it is?” It was posed as a question but Jehan knew better than to treat it as one. Instead he opened up a corner of the blanket and offered it to R, letting him wrap it around his shoulders as well. 

 

“Anyone looking at us right now would get a peek into our world, Grantaire.” Jehan spoke, leaning against the solid weight beside him. “They’d see into our world and make so many assumptions about the moment we’re having right now and about who we are as people. I wonder if I would prefer to be the person they made up in their head.”

 

“I don’t think that person would be half as interesting as the real you.” came the pacifying response. 

 

There was another long bout of silence that was only interrupted by the sound of Jehan crawling into R’s lap and pressing his cold limbs against the other’s warm skin. Grantaire just accommodated by quickly wrapping the blanket around the both of them. 

 

“I’m cold.” Jehan had lost track of the time it took for him to finally utter the nearly condemning words. Those words were almost a secret code at this point. It was a queue telling Grantaire it was okay to take him back inside; that he wasn’t done with his melodrama or his sadness, but he was ready to stop having it happen outside in the freezing weather. 

 

There came a sharp exhaled of relief from above Jehan’s head before he was hoisted up and taken back into the warmth of their shared home. It was almost comical to see the art and writing in the various places on the walls. Jehan had an affinity for writing slivers of poetry on tile as well as on his body, making the backsplash and their bathroom a monastra of unfinished poetry snippets. 

 

Grantaire however, on nights when he was almost too drunk to function or just unable to function properly at all, would paint the walls and whatever desktops they had, the living room and the kitchen being the only walls in the place that were safe from his rainbow of emotions. 

 

It was truly a sight to see and, for anyone expecting something nice and fairly clean, a shock. That was how the pair liked it. 

 

It wasn’t until the both of them were safely covered in blankets, Jehan still laying on top of Grantaire (He had refused to move, even when R offered to let him come back if he really didn't like lying next to the artist instead.) That they began to talk.

 

Jehan had lit a cigarette when they finally got a bit more calmed down, taking special care to not burn the man lying underneath him as he inhaled. 

 

“If an eternity is twenty four hours, does that mean that a lifetime goes by in ten minutes?” Jehan asked his voice sounding all too hurt.

“If that’s the case then we’re both in our last seconds of this lifetime,” Grantaire returned, rubbing calming circles on the poet's back. 

 

“Love me for all of them then?” He asked softly, pressing a soft kiss to the side of Grantaire's face. 

 

Jehan could feel the resounding laugh in R’s chest as he pressed a kiss against the poets forehead and taking his cigarette away from him, inhaling deeply before putting it out on the bedside table. “I will love you and the beautiful colors of your soul until you no longer want me too,” he murmured gently, keeping his lips pressed to Jehans forehead for almost too long. 

 

“Alright then. What was his name?” Grantaire finally asked, keeping Jehan close to him.

 

“You're so cruel to me sometimes! Why do you suppose it was a boy?” Jehan asked, though he had a smile on his face his eyes were sad.

 

“Because you fall in love with every beautiful thing that crosses your path, Jehan. What was his name?”

 

“....I don't remember.” 

 

“Liar.”

 

“His name isn't important then.”

 

“That one I believe. Tell me about him.” 

 

Jehan sighed and finally gave in, taking a deep breath as he allowed Grantaire to run his hands through his hair.

 

“He reminded me of a crow. Not being an imminent threat… but the promise of it being there. He was so pretty too… strong features… tall-”

 

“Ah, the specific descriptor always gets you.”

 

“Shut up. Anyways! He was…. something else I suppose? Scary for everyone else but I liked it when I was on the better end of his right side.”

 

“So you knew he was going to hurt you.”

 

“Damn right I knew. I'm not naive. I just didn't know when. I didn't think it’d be so soon.” He pouted as R grinned and kissed his head again.

 

“My condolences to our friendliest hummingbird.” R stated as he finally pressed a kiss against his lips as soft as he could muster at the moment. Though he loved Jehan, it was hard to not laugh when he got himself into these types of situations. It was always to do with the same inner turmoil. “However… I take it this one hurt more than most?” He asked after a long moment and Jehan only nodded his eyes welling up as he choked out a happy laugh.

 

“I'm stupid, I know. But I enjoyed him. He made me feel special. I liked the attention he offered me, R. I wanted to write poems when I was around him. Poems…. and ask what it was that made him think that maybe just maybe I was worth that second glance.”

 

“...Jehan…” Grantaire had started only to be silenced by a kiss that tasted a bit too much like tears.

 

“Not right now, R. I know I'm worth more than two glances…. I promise you I know, but for right now let me believe everything I'm saying so I can get over it by tomorrow.” He explained softly as the other nodded and pressed another kiss to the crown of his best friend’s head. “Sometimes you need to be sad for a while. That way you can breathe easy the next day. Because you got over the sad.”

 

“....God, you're adorable,” Grantaire murmured, running his hands through the strawberry blonde locks, twirling one of the many braids in his fingers. “So. You knew it was going to end badly?”

 

“I always know when things are going to end badly. But that doesn't stop me from trying. I don't know what it is. I guess I don't actually want it to end bad? I wanna… see if I can make it work. Wanna…. wanna see if-..... I don't know. I just. I knew it was going to end badly. I decided to go for it anyways. You know how it goes.” He mumbled softly pressing his face into Grantaire’s neck.

 

“I know how it goes.” R repeated, keeping one arm wrapped tightly around Jehan’s waist and the other in his hair.

  
There wasn't much talking after that, Jehan had shut his eyes and his breathing had evened out after a while, leaving R with his thoughts; though he had to admit, they consisted mostly of the person in his arms and what the world was going to bring for him.


End file.
